Nine months of LOVE.

Dearest Ms. A,

It's 9am ... and your sisters are off at pre-school.

It's one of my absolute favorite times...

Just you and me.

We actually do a whole lotta nothin' and I love it.

We don't really have a schedule ... you dictate what we do and when.

I just kind of go with your flow.

As I glance up from typing -- you are on the floor playing with two pink balloons.

You think they are the bees knees and I know so because your sweet and soft little voice tells me.

Now you're in the kitchen ... you've pulled yourself up on my chair - flashing your beautiful smile.

You are in the stage, now -- where you are within a few feet of me at all times.

You're willing to go off and play - but you keep close tabs.

You know when I leave the room and you most often follow.

If I'm standing in the kitchen you pull yourself up on my legs and wait.

Wait to be picked up... and you will patiently balance on my legs.... if it takes me a little while to get to you.

We can make a game out of almost anything.

You think everything is hysterical.

Your laugh makes my whole day and lights up MY face every single time I hear it.

You are just so happy, honey.

I am so thankful.

Sometimes ... as your bedtime draws near you begin to cling to me like glue.

Your daddy and I joke you look like you are trying to crawl back inside the womb.

You come up close for hugs and kisses and snuggles.

I LOVE IT.

I'm literally gasping at the fact you are nine months old.

So much has happened this past month.

You cut TWO bottom teeth - they are so cute when you flash your smile.  I can't get enough.

Your appetite continues to grow - and you are a superb eater.

You even tried a little bit of pasta last week. Num, num -- is what you said!

You willingly eat both fruit and veggies .. even peas and spinach!

You are saying lots of fun things ... but "DA DA" is our personal favorite.

You can officially crawl all the way up the stairs... although you will stop every few steps and look back for me.  :)

You can let go and balance on your own for seconds at a time.

Letting go isn't so easy for me as your mama.  I know you are still just a babe - but with each new milestone you inch closer and closer to your 1st birthday.

I can only hope -- as you continue to flourish and even long into your life ... you will stop every so often and look back to be sure I'm there....

Because I always will be.

You have been with us here on earth for nine whole months.

I was thinking back to Christmas last year - when you were tucked inside me.

We traveled home for 3 weeks (from Seattle) and your sisters were awfully sick most of the time.

It was a bit rough as I was about 28 weeks pregnant at that time.

We had many sleepless nights and I remember spending much of that time thinking about YOU.

Of course -- I didn't know who "you" would be, but the thought of you helped me through some of those long, sleepless stretches.

And now that you are here and we approach Christmas again - I am beyond a blubbering mess over how much you have changed and impacted our family.

I told your daddy the other day -- I feel like I officially embraced my role as mama when you came along.

It was like I was finally "all in"... as I realized this is MY calling from God - to be a mama to you and your sisters.

I am really clinging to your babyhood now -- as I can see the sand in the hourglass of your first year of life grow less and less with each passing day.

It's one of those feelings you can't describe.... sadness and joy all mixed together in one.

I receive so many compliments about what a 'happy baby' you are ... and as modest as I usually am -- I can not help but absolutely gloat about what an amazing baby you have been.

I could talk to complete strangers about it all day!!

And, sometimes I do :)

With a very deep breath ... I will reluctantly let you move into your 10th month .... and -- because it's the holiday season I am relishing in the wonderment of often glancing over at our tree and seeing you, our 9 month old babe, underneath it.

You love the lights....and you put your little paws into the water and splash, splash away.

It's an image that will be in my mind - forever.... like when I'm 88 and thinking back to your babyhood.

Especially then - I will remember.

My love for you is immeasurable because it grows every single day.

And I thank you for being exactly who you are ... because without you I would not be me.

Love you forever and ever and ever baby girl.

With love,
Cuz I'm the mama!